Day three of early bedtimes

With Dave out of town and us on day three of trying to get Ava to sleep earlier than 11pm, I was scared I would have to deal with a beast of a baby this Sunday night. And I did. It was our absolute worst night yet.

Here's how our evening went down.

4:54: I wake Ava from her nap. (Is this a huge no-no? Don't care. Doing it anyway.) No naps past 5pm!

5:15: Skype with my fam.

5:20: Ava begins freaking out.

5:21: Shove paci in her face and bounce while Skyping.

5:25: Ava's eyes get heavy...

5:35: Finish Skype and decide it's bath time.

5:45: Bath. Happy girl. Very alert and kicking.

5:55: Read books.

6:00: FUCK BOOKS, GIVE ME BOTTLE NOW.

6:15: Finish 5.5 ounces, eyes getting really heavy.

6:16: Forgot to put her in the sleep sack. Do it now.

6:17: Have the last half ounce from the bottle. Eyes closed.

6:19: In crib, mobile on. Eyes open. (Great.) Just talking to herself.

6:26: Talking is turning to fussing.

6:32: Fussing has turned to wailing. Time for paci in face.

6:39: Asleep with paci in her mouth.

7:18: Wake up crying.

7:19: Diaper changed, paci back in mouth, mobile back on. Eyes close.

7:27: Paci falls out, wake up crying. Get ignored by Mom bc STOP IT.

7:29: Mom gets wine.

7:33: Crying turns to fussing. Then screaming. Then fussing. Do I go up there or what??

7:38: Go upstairs after a particularly loud scream only to find self-soothed baby moments after reaching the top stairs.

7:40: Sneak back downstairs very, very slowly, which freaks Elsie out and she starts barking at me like I'm robbing the place. Baby awake, screaming again. THANKS, ELSIE.

7:44: Won't calm down. Paci in mouth, only mobile song on, back to sleep.

7:45: Wine.

7:52: Paci falls out. Start crying. Ignored by Mom. Cry it out, kid. I'm sorry. Really.

7:59: SCREAMING BLOODY MURDER. Like, making herself choke. I'm going in.

8:00: Well, now we're both crying. Dogs sense I am losing it because they both come upstairs and stand right next to me while I hold the paci in her mouth.

8:01: Paci in mouth, but this time, I wise up: I take it out after she calms down and closes her eyes.

8:02: Asleep. Again.

1:42am: Awake for 20 minutes.

3:15: Awake for 10 minutes.

4:19: Awake because she busts out of her sleep sack. Dammit. I knew I didn't wrap her well enough.

4:54: Awake for 15 minutes.

5:45: Awake.

6:10: Awake. That's it. We both need more sleep than this. I bring her into my bed where we sleep until 7:45.


Today was a black coffee day, which is disgusting. But, oh my god, I never would have lasted without it. Sigh.