The name game

Dave and I picked out a first name for the baby girl a while ago and, as I believe I've mentioned before, my Drunk Grandma thinks we should name the baby after her (Roselyn).

This? Is not happening.

But that didn't stop her from making a few name suggestions while we were all on vacation last month. She was really getting crazy with it, throwing out ideas like Thomasina (not kidding), so I decided to make her a little crazy myself...

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Backstory you need to know: My other grandmother, who passed away in 1995, was named Alice. I wish I could have known and appreciated her as an adult, but I was barely 13 when she died. And Dave's grandmother was named Audrey, which we always liked. Family names just sound nice to me. Naming our daughter either of these "A" names would eat my Drunk Grandma ALIVE. I know this.
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...After one of those out-of-control suggestions, I told her bluntly, "Grandma, we already picked a name."

"You did?" she asked, wide-eyed. "Are you telling?"

"Nope," I said.

"What letter does it start with?" she asked.

"A," I answered.

And I walked away before she could pick her jaw back up off the floor.

DEAL WITH IT, GRANDMA.

Cruel? Perhaps.

Funny? I think so, but I'm an asshole.