Dave and I went to a breastfeeding class at the hospital this past weekend and it was pretty much as delightfully awkward as it sounds.
As is typical with these types of classes, we all had to go around the room and state our names, our due dates, what we're having and any important questions we might want answered in the class. Seeing as I was probably one step away from Functioning Alcoholic before getting pregnant, my burning question would have been something like, "When can I have my beloved wine again and how much can I have and do I need to pump-and-dump and how do I prevent my newborn baby from getting drunk with me, which is really more of a six-month milestone, don't you think?"
Of course, I said none of that and just hoped that we would cover the basics about drinking somewhere during the (long) three hours.
And we did... but for maybe five seconds. Not enough info! I need more details! No drunk newborns!
Well, another mom seemed to have the same train of thought, god bless her. At the end of class, during Q&A time, she immediately asked about whether or not beer can help stimulate milk production, which it did for her cousin. When the lactation consultant answered a noncommittal "not really," the mom goes, "Damn." I laughed. Then she jokes, "What about vodka?" And now I want to be her best friend.
Since we're on the topic, Dave asks about the concept of pumping-and-dumping, for which we didn't get a good or clear answer. (Guess I'll have to let Google be my guide.) My favorite drunk mom jumps in with another question: "What about those alcohol testing strips? Are they accurate? I SWEAR I'M NOT ALCOHOLIC." Isn't she great?
The lactation consultant said she got some testing strips in the mail and wanted to test them, but "couldn't ethically ask a breastfeeding friend" to be her guinea pig. Instead, she said she casually asked the lab their opinion on the testing strips and they brushed it off. Thanks for another non-answer.
So, even though I learned how to breastfeed my baby, I did not learn whether or not I can have more than "a small glass of wine occasionally." Of course, since you can freeze the milk for later use, I think it'd be safest to just stock up on an alcohol-free supply so I can pump-and-dump when needed.
That, or it's going to be another long year of sobriety.
ok so I could be totally off with this but I swear they changed the guidelines after I had clare. Pretty sure that as long as you don't "feel" it you're safe to nurse. No need to pump and dump anymore. As long as its out of your bloodstream its out of your milk. Although look this up cuz I don't want to be responsible for your drunk baby:) IMO those lactation consultants are totally nuts! haha
ReplyDeleteOoh, I like that! I will ask Dr. Google. (Or my real doctor, but whatever.) And, agreed, the consultants are a little... off...
DeleteAt the risk of sounding all kinds of creepy...but hey now, what else is the internet for...Anywhoodle, I just quit the whole breast feeding/pumping gig a month ago. Surprisingly how I kept that shenanigan going for that long is a mystery to me. So as far as the test strips for breastmilk...YES they work, now here is where my real maturity (yes, I am 36...laugh, I do) comes into play. I experimented with margaritas and beer and wine and different amounts of each after drinking them by testing expressed milk at different times after i had drank. That allowed me to develop a sense of security of how much i could drink and when (trust me, sometimes sleep wins over wine when you are hooking your boobs up to a vacuum or another living human)and still be a food trough that was alcohol free. Now unfortunately these beauties are quite pricey...either ask for loads of them from understanding friends and family or do like i did, use the internet to buy them in bulk from the cheapest place (Target! yay!)Basically you will develop a sense for how long you have to drink that beverage (as in I could hoover the tastiest wine, beer, cocktail)in 20 minutes, process it for 2 hours, then nurse like a champ...it went something like this...oh, it's 6 o'clock, i need to pump, and drink 1.5 beers by 7:30 so that i can safely nurse at 10...this does lead to some embarrassing fast college-style guzzling sometimes in public depending on your supply, but in few months you will be a pro!
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